My friend, Marcy, and I were on a road trip one summer, cruising down a backroad that seemed to stretch endlessly through rolling fields and forests. The kind of road where gas stations are mythical creatures you only hear about, but never see… yet I was glad we had stopped at the last one we had seen. It was all smooth sailing—er, cruising… until Marcy shifted in her seat and declared, “I need to pee. Like, now!”
At first, I merry laughed it off. “We’ll find a gas station in five minutes,” I said confidently, even though my GPS wasn’t showing a hint of civilization for miles. But Marcy wasn’t laughing. Her urgency escalated fast. “No, I’m serious. I’m about to explode. Pee everywhere!”
With the threat of that forthcoming shower, we drove for what felt like hours — but was probably 10 minutes — scanning the landscape for anything remotely resembling a restroom. Nothing. Just trees, cows, and a lone, judgmental hawk perched on a fencepost.
Finally, Marcy couldn’t take it anymore. “Pull over!” she announced with the determination of someone who had nothing left to lose… well… except a whole lot of urine.
I pulled over, and Marcy grabbed a handful of napkins from the glove box. “Don’t look,” she barked as she bolted into the nearby bushes. Naturally, I promised not to, but let’s be honest—this whole scene was too funny not to peek a little, right?
A few moments passed, and I heard her voice from the woods. “Oh no!”
“Oh no, what?” I called back, trying not to laugh.
“There’s a raccoon! And… It’s staring at me!”
I just lost it. I was laughing so hard I could barely breathe. “Just ignore it! It’s probably more scared of you than you are of it!”
“It’s not scared at all!” she shouted back. “It’s just sitting there… judging me!”
Somehow, she managed to finish her business and sprinted back to the car, face flushed and muttering about “nature’s little spies.” For the next hour, she refused to talk about anything other than finding a proper restroom, and we both dissolved into laughter every time we tried to make eye contact.
To this day, whenever we pass a wooded area, I’ll say, “You think your raccoon friend is still waiting for you?” And Marcy just groans, “shut up! I’m never, ever discussing that with you again. Ever.”
Marcy’s “007 raccoon incident” has become one of those stories we’ll never stop teasing her about, but honestly, it’s one of my favorite memories. It’s proof that even the most inconvenient moments can turn into life’s most hilarious adventures.
Comments
Post a Comment